Tom Blair,shirt 3

Neural Linguistic Practitioner


Relationship Coach

Internationally read author.

Retired Educator

Is your sex as good as you think?

A recent Redbook survey shows that 52% of women regularly fake orgasms.

Only 17% of women are likely to have an orgasm during sex (Durex Global Sex Survey).

43% of women report “some kind of sexual problem” — like inability to achieve orgasm, boredom with sex, or total lack of interest in sex.

80% of women surveyed say they would rather cuddle than have sex.

As a relationship coach, I have clients that tell me their sex life just isn’t all that they want.  In fact the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists estimates that about half of all couples have an intimacy issue at some time in their relationship

All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. When your emotional needs are not getting met the fire of love cools: the passions, the intimacies even the friendship.  There are 10 emotional needs that everyone needs to have met, at least to some degree.
They are:

Affection, the expression of love in words and action repeatedly and clearly.

Sexual Fulfillment, satisfying sexual experiences and frequency.

Conversation, connecting conversations about plans, feelings, interests.

Companionship, doing enjoyable, recreational activities together.

Honesty and Openness, no lies, no false impressions, no hidden agendas.

Attraction, physical attraction to your partner.

Financial Support, having enough resources to feed clothe and house your family.

Domestic support, creating a home environment that offers refuge form external stress.

Family commitment, providing sufficient time and energy to help raise children.

Admiration / Respect, being valued and appreciated clearly and often.

The importance of these needs will vary over time and between individuals.   What is important to you may not be as important to your partner and what was most important to you in your 20′s may not be the same in your 50′s.

Great sex requires intimacy. And they are NOT the same thing.  To have a great relationship, great intimacy is required.   And you get that from being actively involved in the entire relationship, not just the sex.   Spend some time showing affection, communicating and doing things together that are not sex related.  Intimacy is having a happy and healthy relationship.


Here, we endeavor to bring you the information that you need to make your relationship all that it can be, be it relationship or sexual in nature.


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